El Papito (Es No MAGA Show)

I woke up with a holy gasp, on a headline line,
“An American Pope?”... sucked like end of time.
My coffee froze, my heart beat “nope,”
But turns out, Leo just may be dope…

[Chorus]
No es Trump, no es loco,
Ain’t slingin’ hate or playin’ poco.
He prays in Spanish, walks con paz,
No holy walls, no holy brass.
So yeah, it’s weird, but breathe real slow,
El Papa no es gringo malo, bro.

He chilled in Perú, with dust on his shoes,
Didn’t roll up in jets, or preached loud fake news.
No MAGA rosaries, no Bible bling,
His name’s Leo, not some right-wing king.

Ain’t postin’ prayers on Threads or X,
Ain’t blessin’ greed or crypto checks.
No evil tweets, no dark grace,
No gold-plated lies or metaverse face.

[Chorus]
So calm your fears, let rumors go,
Seems more mate than MAGA show.
Now light a blunt and take it slow,
El Papa no es gringo malo, bro.

No panic, today… not this pope.
Just fact-checked truths, and a bit of hope